Monday, December 21, 2009

Seven Questions

1) Why do I like Mexican hot chocolate better than regular American hot chocolate?

2) Is it wrong to assume, as I shovel snow, that I'm only shoveling it for old people who can't walk well?

3) If you worked with me, and if you organized a nice holiday party and asked me what I'd prefer and we talked about it at length, would you be pissed when I didn't show up?

4) I still don't quite understand why salt melts snow. I get it - freezing point and all that. But why?

5) And why do I like Mexicans better than Americans?

6) If it's snowing and I have to use my boss's truck to drive 15 miles to Target to buy a toothbrush and a phone charger because I left my old toothbrush and phone charger in another city; and if on the way back I stop to pick up some things, maybe dinner, maybe make a stop at Blockbuster or the library, see what's hot; and if then when I get back I park the truck back at my boss's house and call him to tell him that I dug his truck out for when he returns from some British Isle - can I expense the gas?

7) Can I expense the toothbrush?

1 Comments:

Blogger Stanley said...

Hey, you blogged like a billion times! Okay: two. An attempt at some answers:

1) Why do I like Mexican hot chocolate better than regular American hot chocolate?

Didn't the Mexicans (well, the Aztecs) invent hot chocolate? I think so. That is why.

2) Is it wrong to assume, as I shovel snow, that I'm only shoveling it for old people who can't walk well?

As a young person who can't walk well, I say yes, don't assume that.

3) If you worked with me, and if you organized a nice holiday party and asked me what I'd prefer and we talked about it at length, would you be pissed when I didn't show up?

Nah. More booze and cheese for me. (This is my hypothetical party, and there's a lot of booze and cheese, you see.)

4) I still don't quite understand why salt melts snow. I get it - freezing point and all that. But why?

It's that salt water itself has a lower freezing point than water, and when you throw salt on it you're making salt water. It's probably not scientifically correct to describe what's happening as "salt melting the snow". I might be wrong here. I speak ex recta.

5) And why do I like Mexicans better than Americans?

Probably a lower percentage of Mexicans you've interacted are assholes, when compared to the same subset of Americans. But I assure you there are assholes of all nationalities.

6) If it's snowing and I have to use my boss's truck to drive 15 miles to Target to buy a toothbrush and a phone charger because I left my old toothbrush and phone charger in another city; and if on the way back I stop to pick up some things, maybe dinner, maybe make a stop at Blockbuster or the library, see what's hot; and if then when I get back I park the truck back at my boss's house and call him to tell him that I dug his truck out for when he returns from some British Isle - can I expense the gas?

Yes.

7) Can I expense the toothbrush?

Also yes. You were stuck there because of work, right? Expense.

22/12/09 10:44 PM  

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