There have been quite a few Stanley posts in a row now, and yet no comments. What gives, readers? Do you not like the politics? Do you not like the links? Do you not have opinions?
Obviously, it's been a hard week for everyone, seeing as how I haven't posted anything in a while and therefore many people have been forced to read their second favorite blogs, and anything concerning a "second favorite" is always disheartening, especially with blogs, because you'll always be thinking about that first favorite blog, and how good and wonderful and warm it is, and how in that sense the second favorite blog is made even worse because you're not thinking about it while you're enjoying it, you're thinking about the first favorite blog. Change "blog" to "lover" and that's what I'm really talking about, motherfucker.
This is all a horrible shame, obviously, but to make everything infinitesimally better, here are some things I have done recently:
- I made plans to go fishing with my Mexican friends.
- I watched a baseball game.
- I rehearsed.
- I drove to Richmond at midnight to set off fireworks in the middle of the Fan, and then drank until when I would normally be waking up, and then slept, and then drank coffee.
- I dry heaved.
- I watched a klezmer band play for 3 minutes.
- I sat in a park and ate the sun.
- I dry humped.
- I wrote.
- I sat and stared at the James River.
- I read EVERYTHING IS ILLUMINATED.
- I practiced my Italian.
- I placed Scrabble.
- I got my sister drunk.
- I worked.
Obviously, it's been a hard week for everyone, seeing as how I haven't posted anything in a while and therefore many people have been forced to read their second favorite blogs, and anything concerning a "second favorite" is always disheartening, especially with blogs, because you'll always be thinking about that first favorite blog, and how good and wonderful and warm it is, and how in that sense the second favorite blog is made even worse because you're not thinking about it while you're enjoying it, you're thinking about the first favorite blog. Change "blog" to "lover" and that's what I'm really talking about, motherfucker.
This is all a horrible shame, obviously, but to make everything infinitesimally better, here are some things I have done recently:
- I made plans to go fishing with my Mexican friends.
- I watched a baseball game.
- I rehearsed.
- I drove to Richmond at midnight to set off fireworks in the middle of the Fan, and then drank until when I would normally be waking up, and then slept, and then drank coffee.
- I dry heaved.
- I watched a klezmer band play for 3 minutes.
- I sat in a park and ate the sun.
- I dry humped.
- I wrote.
- I sat and stared at the James River.
- I read EVERYTHING IS ILLUMINATED.
- I practiced my Italian.
- I placed Scrabble.
- I got my sister drunk.
- I worked.
posted by Ryan at 18:48
6 Comments:
dry humping is like the boxed wine of sexual activity.
yes, most of us will "drink" it, but only if we have to.
kudos for honesty there pal!
You're soooooo high-brow t(h)om.
I'm not above either (DHing or BW).
i'll cop to both DHing and BW. typically, one has often facilitated the other in my experience.
i'm middle-brow all the way! a man of the people, DHing for the good of all society.
how much DHing have you done for your country lately, Stanley!?
None of late, alas. But I'm glad that with the abbreviation "DH" we can now discuss this topic in settings where we might have previously demured.
I DHed for so long once that my jeans cut a gash into my torso.
DHing is particularly dangerous if you are going commando, and you are with a particularly agressive female who has no regard for the zipper factor. ouch!
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