Pretty please, can you measure out 440 grams of Opti-Red?

So::: at work, every day, inevitably, I am telling certain people what to do. Not everybody. Certain people. Things need to get done and I tell these certain people to do those things, and they do, and those things get done.

So my question::: when these certain people tell me that I would make "a really really awesome border guard," does that mean that I am an asshole?